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Why Can’t I Get Anything Done?: The Quest to Stay Motivated

Our team recently read a meditation book, which prompted me to confront the idea of motivation. Allow me to explain. The book was about the science behind meditation, written by a self-identified skeptic of the benefits. The aim was to convince the reader of all of the benefits of meditation and relieve them of any concerns about doing it perfectly. The author wanted to encourage…
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Why Do I Feel Like a Fraud?: Defining and Challenging Imposter Syndrome

I saw my first private practice client over ten years ago. I had earned a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from a university I had wanted to attend since I was 12; I had completed my Master’s Degree and then worked as a therapist for 3,000 hours under a supervisor before taking and passing not one but two licensing exams, and I had participated in tons…
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When Will I Feel Better?: Understanding and Combating Shame

As I prepared to work on this article, I tried to think about a time when I experienced shame that I could comfortably share to set the stage. Unsurprisingly, that prompted me to avoid working on the article for days… I was suddenly too hungry, tired, or distracted to write. It finally became clear to me that I didn’t want to share my major shame…
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What’s the Point of Crying?: The Benefits of Tears for Mental and Physical Well Being

I have always been sensitive. Growing up, that meant a lot of tears and, unfortunately, a lot of frustration on my parents’ part. “Why are you crying?” and “that’s nothing to cry about” were frequent refrains in my home. When most frustrated with me and my feelings, my mother would say, “I hope you don’t cry like that at my funeral.” So I spent many,…
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Why Can’t I Love Myself?: Learning to Develop a Loving Relationship with Yourself

There have been periods in my life when I didn’t necessarily like myself, much less love myself. After brutal breakups, when I wasn’t accepted into the college of my choice (or any of the places I had applied to, to be honest), when I lose my temper or am unkind to someone I care about, and when I am just struggling. Showing myself love is…
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Two people sitting back to back with one facing the camera with a stern expression while the other looks away

How Do I Deal with Toxic Family Members?: The Mental and Emotional Toll of Navigating Harmful Family Relationships

In my family, we learned that blood is thicker than water. Our relationships with each other were to be prized, no matter the cost. So years ago, when I saw an Instagram post by another therapist I follow, a white one, suggesting that if you have a harmful family member, you should cut them out just like you would a malignant tumor, I was shocked!…
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Why Am I Here?: The Importance of Connecting with Your Purpose for Mental Health and Wellbeing

If you had asked 5-year-old me my reason for living, I would have probably told you that I wanted to be an artist, a parent, and someone who helped the environment. As a child, I loved making things, had a ton of love to give, and saw the benefits of being of service. As I grew up, my immigrant parents tried to morph my passions…
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What is Intergenerational Trauma?: Understanding the Impacts of Intergenerational Trauma on Mental Health

A few weeks ago, my mother accompanied my children and me on an errand. We were in a familiar store, and my 6-year-old went up the escalator ahead of us and then walked off. My mother started to panic and stormed up the escalator, muttering that someone would take off with my daughter. At that moment, I, too, had felt unnerved but was trying to…
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How Do I Manage My Anger?: Tips for Emotional Regulation in a Time of Collective Moral Outrage

To say that these last few years have been difficult would be an understatement. In addition to living through the worst public health crisis this planet has seen for centuries, we’ve witnessed a global social justice movement aimed at combating various forms of systemic and institutionalized oppression that were further exposed by the pandemic, devastating humanitarian crises in Ethiopia, Afghanistan, Yemen, and Ukraine (just to…
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two clear hands held out in front of a face that is blurry to communicate boundaries and saying no

How Do I Set Boundaries?: Learning to Care for Yourself by Advocating for Your Needs

While the term boundary gets used often these days, it doesn’t mean it’s easy to understand what boundaries are necessarily, or what it takes to establish and reinforce them. My eldest started playing basketball this year, and while I’m typically not a huge sports fan, I was invested when it came to watching her play. One of the things that I quickly learned was when…
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