self-care

Where Can I Be Loved and Accepted?: The Importance of Chosen Family for LGBTQIA+ Individuals

Note to reader: In this article, we will be utilizing the term queer to encompass the LGBTQIA+ community in its entirety, including gender-nonconforming, genderqueer, and nonbinary identities. During college, I often felt homesick. I would experience this longing to go home, and when I finally did, I was disappointed. What I longed for had never really existed, or at least not where I imagined it…
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Why Can’t I Get Anything Done?: The Quest to Stay Motivated

Our team recently read a meditation book, which prompted me to confront the idea of motivation. Allow me to explain. The book was about the science behind meditation, written by a self-identified skeptic of the benefits. The aim was to convince the reader of all of the benefits of meditation and relieve them of any concerns about doing it perfectly. The author wanted to encourage…
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Why Can’t I Love Myself?: Learning to Develop a Loving Relationship with Yourself

There have been periods in my life when I didn’t necessarily like myself, much less love myself. After brutal breakups, when I wasn’t accepted into the college of my choice (or any of the places I had applied to, to be honest), when I lose my temper or am unkind to someone I care about, and when I am just struggling. Showing myself love is…
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Two people sitting back to back with one facing the camera with a stern expression while the other looks away

How Do I Deal with Toxic Family Members?: The Mental and Emotional Toll of Navigating Harmful Family Relationships

In my family, we learned that blood is thicker than water. Our relationships with each other were to be prized, no matter the cost. So years ago, when I saw an Instagram post by another therapist I follow, a white one, suggesting that if you have a harmful family member, you should cut them out just like you would a malignant tumor, I was shocked!…
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How Do I Get Over a Breakup?: Tips for Coping with the End of a Relationship and Moving On

During one of my more devastating breakups, for days, I cried myself to sleep and woke up in the mornings to a pillow quite literally soaked with tears. I remember thinking that the pain may be similar to having an appendage forcibly removed. Reflecting on these details, they seem over the top, but these are my distinct memories of this time. I didn’t think I…
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How Do I Manage My Anger?: Tips for Emotional Regulation in a Time of Collective Moral Outrage

To say that these last few years have been difficult would be an understatement. In addition to living through the worst public health crisis this planet has seen for centuries, we’ve witnessed a global social justice movement aimed at combating various forms of systemic and institutionalized oppression that were further exposed by the pandemic, devastating humanitarian crises in Ethiopia, Afghanistan, Yemen, and Ukraine (just to…
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two clear hands held out in front of a face that is blurry to communicate boundaries and saying no

How Do I Set Boundaries?: Learning to Care for Yourself by Advocating for Your Needs

While the term boundary gets used often these days, it doesn’t mean it’s easy to understand what boundaries are necessarily, or what it takes to establish and reinforce them. My eldest started playing basketball this year, and while I’m typically not a huge sports fan, I was invested when it came to watching her play. One of the things that I quickly learned was when…
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Should I Start a Diet?: Rethinking Your Relationship with Your Body

While it may not have been the first time I was critical of my body, the first time I remember being critical of my body, or of objectifying my own body, is when I was 8-years-old. I was watching something on TV and it was definitely not a show for children. On the show, the it-girl started talking about her weight loss, going as far…
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Image of two individuals with trash bags picking up litter off of the beach. Both are dressed in warm clothing and are wearing gloves.

Is Doing Good Good for You?: The Effects of Philanthropy and Giving on Mental Health

“Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, What are you doing for others?” — Martin Luther King, Jr. The end of the year can be a time of stress for many. Spending time with family, while joyful for some, can still carry its own challenges and complications. The holidays can be quite loaded, and planning for the holidays can bring up fears, sadness, and feelings…
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Image of the shape of a person under the covers in bed. Superimposed on this image is a quasi-transparent image of a woman with her head back to depict layers of grief.

How Do I Know if This is Grief?: Understanding and Honoring Grief In All Shapes, Sizes, and Seasons

Over the past 20 months I have watched more TV and movies than I had in years. They offered me a way to cope, a distraction, and space to process. Unsurprisingly, the common theme in a lot of the shows and films I watched last year was grief. It just couldn’t be escaped. Animated films, TV shows… grief was everywhere. I suspect that’s because we…
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